"I can beat that," I tell my friend, laughing too loud even for the too loud cafe. We've been entertaining each other with funny and funny-because-they're-sad stories from work. I know my next story will win the undeclared competition: "My boss came up to me at a Christmas party and honked my boobs." I can tell I have her attention by the abrupt silence and wide eyes. "A … [Read more...] about I’m too sober for this
I'm easily distracted. I'll pick up my phone to look for something and realize ten minutes later, after putting it down, that I didn't look for the item. I'm very bad with money. I get a little bit and the compulsion to spend it is immediate and often almost overwhelming. I'm shocked I've managed to save any money at all. I don't remember what I wore yesterday, or last … [Read more...] about The things my friends may not know about me
Along the way we realized that the two good looking guys in the table next to ours were quiet, riveted by our conversation. Of course, we were a group of women discussing breast size and boob jobs without using our indoor voices. I think we can forgive them. This was my semi-yearly lunch with what I call my "brunch friends." We almost only ever get together for lunch or … [Read more...] about My Sex and the City Lunch
I love to talk. If you've ever met me, you know that I love love love to talk. It's a family trait. We learn to speak early; we master complete sentences fast; we incorporate sarcasm seamlessly (at four years old, I think). We love to talk. And we're very loud when we do it. A family conversation can dominate an entire restaurant, whether we meant to do that or not. (We are … [Read more...] about Can you keep a secret?
At what point do you stop being friends with someone? What's your line in the sand? She asked me what my size is, casually, because she's lost all this weight and has clothes she needs to get rid of now. The clothing is size -X2 (ie., two sizes smaller than I am now; note I am "X"). I told her what my size is. This is something I wouldn't tell my sister, wouldn't answer … [Read more...] about I think we’re not friends any more