Is there a polite way to tell people to back the frack off and that what they’re asking is none of their business?
Yeah, I didn’t think so.
At a breakfast this morning someone I barely know grilled me for 10 minutes on the retirement plan at work. And I was polite, I really was. I answered her questions as vaguely as I could, growing increasingly irritated at her more pointed and less polite questions as they came my way. And at no time did she realize that she was being intrusive and offensive.
The most important thing here to note is that we were having breakfast so she could ask me to do some committee work for her group. She was asking me for a favor, which I’ve already declined once, and the way she did that was to make me irritated and upset.
I honestly don’t think she knows that she essentially guaranteed that I would not take her up on her invitation to be on the committee and that she’s also ensured that we never become any closer than we are today, which is not at all. I’m petty that way.
When did it become OK to ask someone whether they have a retirement, what they pay for it, what their employer pays, and how long you have to be there to be vested? Unless I’ve made an appointment with you to review my retirement plan, these questions are out of bounds. And, for future reference, if you ask me intrusive questions on a day when I’m not feeling polite… well, the dislike will go both ways.